We have certainly had news at our house this week.  I’ll bet there are others who have also had their challenges.

My husband is doing well.  It is nice to be able to talk openly about his MS now.  It is good for him, as well.  The heat is very hard on him and, as a carpenter, that wasn’t going to make it anymore.  So, he’s looking forward.  My husband has always been quite an inspiration to me.  He doesn’t think negatively.  It isn’t that he thinks positively (and here I’m laughing a bit).  Skip just doesn’t think negatively.  His positivity isn’t a reorientation of his thinking, it is the way he has always looked at life.

In 30 years, we have had joys and sorrows.  Skip seems to look at all the same way – with hope.  It’s what is of the moment; and he knows that moment changes.  He’s been a person courageous and willing to change, willing to adapt.  A hard worker and appreciative of his woodworking skill, he has used that well.

I believe the most important thing I have learned (and continue learning) from Skip is forgiveness.  Again, not a reorientation of his thinking; it wouldn’t occur to him to hang onto something about someone.    A well-grounded understanding of human nature, and not much ruffles feathers.  I had to learn that, practice it.

‘Lightening up’ in our thinking, being that mindful observer – taking a step back, assessing before making the decision how, or if, to act, that’s what makes the difference.  The old adage, “sleep on it”, very good advice when possible.  Thinking, contemplating, patience.  Taking oneself out of that reactive, defensive posture, so that you may see clearly your opportunities and choices, and not be so invested in what someone else has done or said, but in the person you have decided (daily) to be.  Then, your thoughts and actions become habitually directed toward that goal.  This is what I see in my husband.  The ability to maintain his center, and from that forgiveness just follows.

Each day I’m thinking of those who thoughtfully visit, and hoping that your needs are met, that your present moments are those of  hope.  Thank you for stopping by.  Lilie


2 thoughts on “A LITTLE RAMBLING

  1. Skip sounds similar to my partner! I’ll get wicked grouchy about something seemingly small sometimes, and his outlook always seems to be healthier. We are lucky to have those men in our lives. Sometimes I wonder if it is because we get more emotional sometimes, and they seem to be able to think before being emotional at certain points…or something like that. I’d like to echo back the kind wishes you have at the end of this post and hope for you that your needs are met and that your moments are pleasant today 🙂

  2. mliddle says:

    Hello Alie –
    It sounds as if you & your husband Skip seem to be a good match for each other. If Skip’s positivity is his way of thing, being open & caring seems to be your way of being. And Skip bringing patience to the table allows you to bring patience in other aspects of your life so that it enhances your caring. I’m sure there are many other qualities you both have that enhance your relationship together. We can see some of your qualities, Lilie, by looking at the ways we are coming to know you (on top of the ones stated above): interested in others & the welfare of others; others tend to be receptive to you; self-reflective, etc. You are creating a wonderful community in which we can all know one another.
    It’s nice to hear, Jennifer, that you have a supportive hubby as well. Sometimes they can make llife easier!

    Many blessing to everyone!

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